Loving yourself enough to show up

The past few weeks, I’ve been in a funk. Mentally, I haven’t been sharp. Physically, I’ve kept going to the gym, but my workouts felt empty—more like I was just going through the motions.

That’s tough for someone who prides himself on routine and productivity. I cycled through a lot of emotions: feeling stuck, disappointed, even borderline depressed. I beat myself up for falling out of rhythm, told myself I wasn’t doing enough, and questioned whether I was where I should be.

And I don’t think I’m alone in this. A lot of men carry that same weight, especially with the pressure to be great constantly hanging over us. Sometimes it comes from social media, family, or friends. Other times it’s internal—the quiet voice reminding us of who we think we should be. Either way, it’s natural to feel disappointed when we fall short of our own expectations.

But here’s the truth—beating yourself up doesn’t help.

What helped me was learning to step back.

The Importance of Stepping Back

When you’re in the middle of the storm, everything feels bigger than it is. It’s only when you step back that you see things clearly. That pause—whether it’s taking a day for yourself, unplugging from social media, or going on a long walk—gives you space to process.

Stepping back isn’t weakness. It’s strategy. It’s a chance to reset, reevaluate, and come back stronger. When I finally slowed down, I realized a few things:

• My relationship was draining me in ways I hadn’t admitted.

• I was overworked and physically fatigued.

• I had been neglecting my own mental health practices—journaling, reading, meditation.

  
  

These realizations only came once I gave myself permission to pause.

Loving Yourself Enough to Show Up

This is where self-love and self-respect come in. We often think of love as something soft or passive, but real love for yourself is active. It’s discipline. It’s making choices today that your future self will thank you for.

Respecting yourself means showing up—even when you don’t feel like it. It means going to the gym when motivation is gone, or sitting with your journal when your head is full of noise. Not because it’s easy, but because you value yourself enough to keep building.

Self-love isn’t about comfort. It’s about care. It’s saying:

• “I deserve to feel good, so I’m going to move my body.”

• “I deserve peace, so I’m going to protect my energy.”

• “I deserve growth, so I’m going to do the hard work.”

  
  

When everything feels like it’s slipping, the solution isn’t to grind harder—it’s to return to those basics. Reset your habits. Prioritize your mental health. Take inventory of what’s in your control. Let go of what isn’t.

Your peace and your progress depend on how well you can detach from problems, step back when needed, and then choose to show up again with clarity and intention.

Because at the end of the day, loving yourself enough to show up—especially when it’s hard—is one of the strongest forms of respect you can give yourself.

-Matt